NOOOOvember 2015: Cara’s Top 5 Disappointments of 2015

Even Frodo understands the crushing blow of a disappointing movie.

Hey, folks! Many apologies for my absence of late. Over the past week I have been dealing with: 1) a water heater busting and turning half of my apartment into a lake, 2) a brief bout of illness, and 3) driving five hours away from home to take a week-long class for work. Yes, I am writing you from a fancy schmancy hotel while my apartment is hopefully not rapidly breeding mold…Okay, I exaggerate. My apartment did half drown, but it was swiftly taken care of and is now quite dry, thank the lord. Also, the hotel is not fancy schmancy. But it’s clean and comfortable, and I probably wouldn’t know how to behave in a fancy schmancy hotel anyway, so it’s cool.

Anyway, as many of you who have been around my blog for a while probably know, for the past two years I’ve done a little series called NOOOOvember in which I invite guests to come on over and write about movies that they had hoped were going to be good but actually turned out to be massive disappointments. I did not do a callout for that this year. Not because I don’t love having you guys here—you’re literally the best and you make my blog a million times better—but just because I decided I had such a backlog of things to write about that I should focus on catching up on that instead. However, I didn’t want to let the NOOOOvember season slip by completely unnoticed either. So I decided to type up a little list about a few of the disappointments I’ve experienced this year. They are as follows…

 

#5: Maze Runner: The Scorch Trials

scorch trials 2

Okay, this is the best of the worst for a reason. Fact is, I actually didn’t mind The Scorch Trials so much. It’s a decent enough sci-fi/action flick that I had a fair amount of fun with when I went to see it. Ultimately, my issues with it come from two things: 1) It wasn’t as good as The Maze Runner, and 2) I later found up that almost everything in the film is different from the book. As someone who has not read the second Maze Runner book, I guess I don’t have a right to be upset about the apparently many changes, but I went with a friend who was all too aware of these changes, and when she described some of them to me, I was a bit taken aback that the film decided to go in such a drastically different direction. I’m cool with straying from the source material if it makes the film better, but in this case I think they may have dropped the ball.

 

#4: The Man from U.N.C.L.E.

the man from uncle

In a year of pretty excellent spy films (i.e. Mission Impossible: Rogue Nation, Spy, and Kingsman: The Secret Service), one of them just had to be a letdown. To be fair, I actually did like The Man from U.N.C.L.E. But from the thoroughly entertaining trailers, I expected to love it, and I just couldn’t. It has a great cast and style out the wazoo, yet even so there’s something lacking there. Not only is the story not particularly unique or interesting, but there were a few moments in the film that actually made me pause and think, “Is it just me or was that really stupid?” Probably not a good sign. And probably, by most standards, not the best film.

 

#3: Tomorrowland

tomorrowland

Now we’re starting to break into the films that actually made me angry. I mean, how could Disney let me down?! Although I guess if I’m being honest, Disney’s live-action endeavors rarely totally work for me. Admittedly, Cinderella wasn’t so bad, but Tomorrowland is definitely another story. Let’s review this film’s offenses. Making George Clooney into a vaguely creepy jerk? Check. Completely throwing subtlety out the window to shove its key themes in our faces? Check. Wasting a solid premise on something that becomes painfully hollow and generic? Double check. I could go on, but I think you get the idea. Oddly reflecting one of the core points of the film itself, Tomorrowland has a lot of promise, yet it simply doesn’t become what it could be. The film may have a happy ending, but my review does not.

 

#2: Poltergeist

poltergeist 2015

Why, oh, why did I risk getting my hopes up for this? God knows I’ve been burned by horror remakes before. Really, I should’ve learned from the likes of Carrie. It’s not that this (or Carrie, for that matter) is so very horrible—it’s just that horror remakes tend to leave me with an overwhelming feeling of “what the hell was the point?” Not only does Poltergeist barely lift a finger to liven up the original story with something new, but the few changes that it does make are not that great. I mean, I know Zelda Rubinstein has long since passed, may she rest in peace, but to put Jared Harris in her place is just…a big no. Harris can be great, sure, but he lacks the sizeable sass that made little Rubinstein’s character so fantastic. Plus, the teenager in this is painfully bad. Like, nearly everything she said and did made me cringe. The trailer suggested a lot of promise for this one—perhaps an edgier, creepier version of a horror so many of us know and love—but what we get is just not worth whatever crazy amount of money Hollywood spent.

 

#1: Fantastic Four

fantastic four 2

I don’t know if it will ever NOT pain me to talk about this movie. Guys…what happened with this one? The trailers for Fantastic Four looked awesome—almost Interstellar-esque. But the movie itself…I mean, yikes. The cast is stacked with young stars, the tone is drastically different from the previous set of Fantastic Four films (very much on purpose, I believe), and the effects are pretty cool, so it should add up to at the very least an okay superhero movie, right? WRONG. Fantastic Four is a jumbled mess of a film that made me feel like someone had slipped something into my drink at the movie theater. The characters are weak, the tone is all over the place, and the story jumps around so much that it’ll leave you dizzy and confused. I’ve never been a fan of the cheesy Fantastic Four films of the mid-2000s, but if this tells you anything, this remake caused me to look back on those with a sense of nostalgia. It’s that bad. It’s my I, Frankenstein of this year, truly putting the NOOOO in NOOOOvember.

 

How about it, kiddos? Any of these among your top most-hated films of the year? I’m pretty curious to see what everybody else has hated so far, so by all means, comment below! Anyway, I’m going to try to put up an important post tomorrow, but I will also be studying for an important test tomorrow…so we’ll see. Either way, expect a post you’ll want to pay close attention to very soon! 🙂

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27 thoughts on “NOOOOvember 2015: Cara’s Top 5 Disappointments of 2015

  1. Haven’t seen many 2015 flicks, yet. In fact, I haven’t gotten to any of these. I’m sure I will, though. I’m least looking forward to The Fantastic Four. I hated the other ones and the trailers for this one didn’t look any better.

  2. The Scorch Trials was TERRIBLE and a major kick in the teeth. However, I LOVED The Man From U.N.C.L.E. It ticked more boxes than I expected it would, and I was pretty amped for it to start with. As for the rest of your list, I haven’t seen them. But Fantastic Four? Nope. Wasn’t on my watch list and certainly won’t be after the way it tanked haha.

    I was actually wondering the other day if I had missed the call out for this. Glad I didn’t.

    Enjoy the hotel, and I am glad to hear your apartment was saved!

    • I didn’t hate Scorch Trials, but I feel ya–not nearly as good as it could’ve been. Well, I’m glad somebody appreciated Man from U.N.C.L.E. I just thought it would be…more. But it wasn’t terrible, so at least there’s that. Yes, don’t go near Fantastic Four. You will regret it. Yeah, sorry, lady–probably should’ve sent out something saying I wasn’t going to do NOOOOvember this year. But thank you! The hotel was fine, but I’m glad to be back in my nice, dry apartment. Lol.

  3. I’ve seen all of them except Scorch Trials. I really did enjoy UNCLE. It’s dry humor worked really well to me. Fantastic Four sounded bad from the start but I didn’t expect it to be so god-awful. Just caught up with and reviewed Tomorrowland. Yep, thoroughly disappointing. As for Poltergeist, I’ve had a review ready to post for weeks now. I’ll just say I’m with ya. Not much there to even warrant a remake.

    • Yeah, U.N.C.L.E. seems to have pleased a fair share of people. I just expected something more for whatever reason. It sounds like we’re agreed on all the others. Such a waste of potential! Oh well…

  4. I actually quite liked Tomorrowland, (and The Scorch Trials and UNCLE) but I’m probably in the minority! 😛 Haven’t seen the other two. Disappointments for me have been Focus, Chappie, and Terminator Genisys. Enjoy your trip!

    • Haha. Well I don’t know about the other two, but a lot of people seem to be speaking up for U.N.C.L.E., so maybe I just missed something everyone else saw. I haven’t seen any of your disappointments, but yeahhh I’ve heard they weren’t great. Too bad about Chappie–I’d had hopes for that one. As for the trip…well, more of an obligated work thing that entailed a somewhat stressful class…but, hey, I survived. Lol. Thanks, Adam!

  5. Nice one Cara, I haven’t seen any of these films so I feel really lucky for not wasting my time! Bummer about the water explosion in your apartment though, that sounds really annoying. Enjoy the hotel though! 😀

    • Yes, you avoided some stinkers with these, lady! Lol. Yeah, the water explosion was definitely annoying, but it’s all dry here now, thank goodness! Thanks, Anna! 🙂

  6. i actually enjoyed FF and Tomorrowland. Totally agree with u on UNCLE and have no desire to see the other two.

    Nice to see you getting back into things…5 hours for a weekly course? hope its 2.5 hrs each way and not 5 each way 🙂

    Enjoy the hotel and the surfing in ur apt! 🙂

  7. I’ve only seen UNCLE from that list and it wasn’t good. I have no intentions of watching any of the top 3 as I’ve only heard bad things about them. Scorch Trials I will though but I haven’t read the books, so changes don’t matter to me. And I liked the first part. But what I’ve seen besides the UNCLE… Let’s see… Oh, I saw (almost all of) American Sniper in February. I hated it. Absolutely hated it. I didn’t finish it. It was so off-putting that it’s hard to describe. Ugh. It’s really from 2014 but I only saw it this year. Oh, Terminator Genisys. Oh my, it was bad. Gosh. Southpaw was probably the biggest disappointment because I really had high hopes and Gyllenhaal and especially McAdams are really good in it. The writing sucks big time. And it was boring. Into the Woods! It’s also from 2014 but that was such a waste of time. And talent. Boooooooooring. And another from 2014, Foxcatcher. It felt like it never ends. And those colours offended my eyes. And how Tatum looks. Like a monkey. No no, not good at all. Thankfully straight after Foxcatcher I saw Whiplash that is so far the best of the year for me. And lastly the film that was ok but not great: How to Train Your Dragon 2. Only because I absolutely loved the first part and this just diminishes in comparison. 😦

    • Well, of the ones you’ve mentioned, I’ve only seen Into the Woods and How to Train Your Dragon 2…and I actually loved them both! Haha. I know Into the Woods hasn’t gotten a lot of love, but I’m partial to it because it’s one of my all-time favorite musicals. I did it in high school, and it was a blast. As much as I liked the movie, I think a live production does it more justice. As for HTTYD 2, I do see where you’re coming from. Not as good as the first one for sure, but I still enjoyed it. Thanks, lady! 🙂

  8. Well I’ve only seen Uncle and Tomorrowland and I’d agree about Tomorrowland, but since I had no real expecatations for Uncle, I don’t feel all that disappointed by it!

  9. I started going through movie blog posts to see if there was one for NOOOOvember. Plus, I was scanning other comments for links to disappointing reviews (why are lackluster movies so interesting to read about?)—but I wasn’t seeing any. As I went through my list, a lot of documentaries popped out as being pretty poor (Lambert & Stamp, An Honest Liar) but for only a few had I high-hopes that were dashed. Anyway, here’s my list of links in chronological order (and I didn’t even hit 5) …

    Dear White People ( http://jayceland.com/blog/archive/2015/02/02/movies-janaury-2015/ ): I had high hopes for this one—a comedy about the titular snarky college radio show—but, while following the Spike Lee playbook, it failed to create an engaging film.

    The Gang’s All Here ( http://jayceland.com/blog/archive/2015/04/03/movies-in-march-2015/ ): Although it’s from 1943, I saw this for the first time this year. I really wanted to see the supposedly astonishing Busby Berkeley dance numbers with Carmen Miranda. While the dance sequences were works of art, the rest of the film was a dreary wet noodle.

    Kumiko the Treasure Hunter ( http://jayceland.com/blog/archive/2015/05/05/movies-in-april-2015/ ): How could a movie about a woman searching for the treasure buried in Fargo go so wrong? I mean naming Fargo was perhaps the Chekhov’s gun that led to such disappointment—if the film was fictional or lesser known, I don’t think I would have had such high hopes.

    Electric Boogaloo: The Wild, Untold Story of Cannon Films ( http://jayceland.com/blog/archive/2015/11/04/movies-in-october-2015/ ): As a fan of 80s action schlock, I was definitely interested to see this, but without securing interviews with the studio’s founders, Menahem Golan and Yoram Globus, the story just slams flat into a wall.

    • Wow I haven’t even heard of some of these! Admittedly, documentaries aren’t always my style, but it’s always good to know which ones to avoid. Haha. Thanks for the tips! And sorry they were disappointing. I feel your pain. :/

  10. I didn’t mind IFrankenstein :], but The Fantastic 4 was the worst movie I’ve seen in the last 3 or 4 years. It’s actually one of the only movies I’ve watched that came out this year. I haven’t seen anything else on your list so I can’t comment on them.

    • Oh man. More power to you for finding anything to appreciate in I, Frankenstein. I thought that was even worse than Fantastic Four, and you know how I felt about that. Lol. I’m glad we’re on the same page with FF though. What a wretched, wretched film…

  11. So much potential, so much pain… 😉 For me, quite a few films in 2015 felt like they didn’t really live up to their potential, and oddly, films I wasn’t really as excited about ended up really impressing me. I never thought Mad Max: Fury Road and Ant-Man would be ending the year at the top of my list! 😉 I’m really keeping my fingers crossed for Star Wars; don’t let me down, JJ Abrams!

    • Oh I’m totally with you. I figured Ant-Man would be a fair bit of fun, but I though Mad Max was gonna be way too weird for me. Turns out I loved it! Seriously, Star Wars has to rock. I simply cannot imagine a future in which we’re disappointed by it. Lol.

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